Being a mom is a hard job. We often feel as though we are being pulled in dozens of different directions all at once, and it can seem like, no matter what we do and what choices we make, someone is judging and telling us it was the wrong decision. It can lead to unhappiness, and that is a shame. Being a parent is such a wonderful thing that letting others dictate your own happiness means you miss out on the enjoyment of being a mom. Therefore, it needs to stop, and here are some excellent ways you can be a happy mom, enjoy your children, and forget about everyone else.
Find The Right Balance
Motherhood is a balancing act between being with your children and taking time to be by yourself, between working and staying at home, between being ‘you’ and being ‘mom,’ and much more. What works for one person in terms of balance might not work for another, which is why it is essential you work out your own ideal balance and stick with it.
You might choose to work full time, part time, or not at all, for example. No matter which you choose, you will have your reasons, and you will work out your own happiness from it. Don’t listen to anyone else about this; you need to do what’s best for you and for your family. As time goes on, you can easily make adjustments depending on where you feel you are needed most, so remember that nothing is set in stone and you can change anything that needs to be changed.
Perfect Doesn’t Exist
We often strive for perfection, but when it comes to parenting (and almost anything else in life), perfect doesn’t exist. It’s essential to keep this in mind and know that loving your children and being loved back is what counts. If you have this, whatever else you do will be good enough, and good enough is something to strive for rather than perfection.
If you keep searching for perfection, you won’t be a happy mom because you will be looking for something that you can’t find and missing out on the fun that good times that you could be having with your children. They don’t care if you or whatever you are trying to do is perfect as long as you are there with them.
Don’t Forget Yourself
When you become a mom, it is overwhelming and all-consuming, no matter how many times you do it. Yet it is important not to forget yourself in the midst of it all. It might not be possible, to begin with, but over time you must do things that are just for you. Go out with friends, learn more about fashion and go shopping for new clothes, take an art class, go for a walk, try new things or go back and do things you did before the children were born.
Although it’s crucial to be a good parent and not to neglect your children, you also need to be yourself and do things that you enjoy to make you happy. This is another example of balance and a significant one. Being a mom is important, but it’s not everything you are, and having hobbies and interests is vital to your happiness and health.
Take Care Of Yourself
It can be extremely easy to neglect your own needs when you are so focused on caring for your children, but this is a bad idea. If you aren’t looking after yourself, you won’t be happy, and you might not be healthy, and that means you won’t be able to care for your children in the best possible way.
Taking the time for some self-care now and then will make you a better parent, and a happier one. You will be the parent that your children need, and that’s what everyone wants. It might be that you need five minutes’ peace now and then and you shut the bedroom door to get it. It might be that you take up a hobby or interest as mentioned above. Perhaps you want to get away for longer with your friends, and you take a weekend or a week away somewhere. You’ll feel better for it afterward, and you never feel guilty for taking the time to make yourself feel better either.
Don’t Compare
It seems that human beings have always compared themselves to other people, but with the advent of social media, this has become easier and easier. Now we can see what other people’s lives are like 24/7, and it can be a worrying thing, especially when we look at our own lives and don’t feel they measure up.
Social media is not real life. People only tend to post the very best parts of their lives there to show that everything is good and they are happy. You may even do the same. People don’t tend to post anything about a tedious day, or a day when nothing much happened, for example. You should always take anything posted on social media with a pinch of salt, and never compare anything you see to your own life. Everyone struggles, everyone has bad days, and you are not the only one who doesn’t have all the answers.
Comparing your life to other people’s will make you unhappy, so it’s best not to worry about anyone else and concentrate on making your life as good as possible for you and your children.
Slow Down
You may have a lot to do, and especially when you have young children that list can seem endless. Instead of trying to race through everything and cause yourself stress, which will be reflected in your children, take a moment to slow down. At the start of each day work out what needs to be done and what can wait. You might want to clean the house, for example, but what if that means you miss out on a sunny day when you could be enjoying the yard or the park? What will mean more when you look back at your kids’ childhood?
Do what needs to be done, even if it means other things have to be left until later. It’s far more important to be happy than anything else.
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